Get Over It
by Obviously Oblivious
Summary: Lily's been labelled weird, a book-aholic, insane and a fantastic Chaser but one thing she's never been is jealous. What's brought on this uncharacteristic behaviour? Read and find out...ChapterIII is up
1. I

Get Over It 

**_Chapter I_**

_~By Pixie~_

I blanched. My eyes were wide. Trapped. Now I'm done for. 

"Miss Evans?" Professor McGonagall said again, persistently and then resolved to glare at me with pursed lips.

"I-I didn't…do… it," I stuttered, honestly I was going to kill those guys later on. 

"Well the Great Hall didn't get filled with charmed banners without any help," my transfiguration teacher, and also the Head of Gryffindor (my house) said almost sarcastically "you are the top of your Charms class-and obviously the prime suspect here."

"But," I protested, "I honestly didn't do it. Well not all of it," I muttered under my breath.

"What was that?"

"Nothing Professor," I said sweetly, hoping that the innocent-school-girl routine would work. "But I honestly didn't do it." I crossed my fingers behind my back. Well I didn't do _all_ of it. God am going to kill those guys for this later. 

"Weeeell," Professor McGonagall said with a raised eyebrow-she still wasn't convinced I was innocent. "I can't convict you of something that can't be proven. Take this as a warning. Next time-detention."

I nodded, looking concerned "Of course Professor." Like I hadn't had had a detention before in my life. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes.

"You may go now Miss Evans," she told me and I gratefully escaped her office and made my way to the Gryffindor Tower.

~*~

It was all those stupid boys' fault. Honestly, all right, so they wanted to pull a prank on the Slytherin's. They didn't _have_ to get me involved did they? _Nooo._ But did they? Of course, why not! I wasn't actually really mad at them, sort of more amused than anything, because they really do hate it when other people get credit for their work. Credit meaning an interrogation by McGonagall and possibly a detention. But I suppose it was sort of my prank too, after all I had charmed the banners (twenty in all) to flash "Stinky Slytherin's sit here" over the Slytherin table. The words weren't mine, the idea wasn't mine, and I certainly hadn't _wanted_ to do it (not much anyway), but you know. 

It's all part of the fun. My name is Lily Evans, and I'm going insane. Slowly but surely, I'm slipping away into that un-chartered territory where people like Sirius Black are considered normal. No, I'm not really going insane and I'm not going sailing to a foreign land, Sirius Black _definitely_ isn't normal, but I _am_ Lily Evans and a compulsive book-aholic. Honestly, if it's printed and distributed to the masses, I'd be surprised if I haven't read it. With some exceptions of course, I draw the line at paperback romance novels that you'll normally find your mother or grandmother reading, to be horribly stereotypical, and I don't tend to read picture books anymore. 

Obviously, from that you should be able to realize that I'm a Muggleborn. Born just outside of Kent, moved to London at age three. Not that I remember all that much of Kent, but I assume it is a nice place. Also, I go to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Yep. I'm a freak. Ha. Petunia (my sister) is the freak. Honestly, who co-ordinates pink with a shocking custard yellow? Perhaps its something "non-freaks" understand. 

Anyway, I'm a sixth year now, yes that's right, sweet sixteen and all, and I'm also a prefect. Not that you'd be able to tell. But anyway, my friends are the mischievous Marauders, otherwise known as Remus Lupin, Sirius Black, Peter Pettigrew and they're misguided by none other than James Potter. I approached the Fat Lady.

"Lexitalionis," I said, hating the fact that our passwords were mostly Latin these days. So damned hard to remember. The Common Room was half full, as it was after school and I could spot out the objects of my thoughts easily.

"You four are going to pay for that," I declared as I strolled over to where they were sitting and squished on the couch beside Remus.

"Pay for what?" Peter asked, with a confused look on his face.

Sirius rolled his dark eyes, and James groaned, "The prank Peter," then he turned to me "So, did McGonagall get up you?"

"Sort of. I mean, she wanted to give me detention, but she had no proof," I said offhandedly "you know you guys _could_ have stayed around so I wasn't singled out."

James and Sirius shook their heads immediately, with an almost frightened look on their faces.

"We couldn't Lily," Remus said "McGonagall told us yesterday, one more stuff up and we're all banned from Hogsmeade."

"Oh yes," I mused, remembering hearing all about it the day before "you guys are terrible. Second week of school for the year, and you're already almost banned. We haven't even had a Hogsmeade weekend yet."

"Too true," Peter said dejectedly. 

"Well we just have to behave for a bit," James said solemnly. 

I snorted.  "As if!"

"Or just not get caught," Sirius said with a cunning grin.

"That's more like it," Remus said.

"Remmy!" I admonished, poking him in the ribs "You're the sensible one. Be…sensible."

"Are you serious? Me, be sensible with these twats around all the time? I don't think so," he replied with a grin and copped the light punches the other boys gave him. It was amazing how much he'd changed since our first year, and even our third year. Once a upon a year ago, Remus Lupin was the quietist and more introverted guy at Hogwarts. But something happened, and he got admitted into the elite group of lunatics that are our friends and hey presto- he's laughing and joking and slightly less uptight. 

"Remus, you should know by now that I'm not Sirius," I said, using possibly the most over used cliché known to man at Hogwarts. Regardless of how un-humorous it apparently is to everyone else I proceeded to crack up laughing. The boys just shook their heads at me.

"Honestly Lily," James said almost aspirated, after I finished chortling for four minutes "you have the worst sense of humor, well if you can call it humor." 

I shrugged "And? You're point is?"

"It's weird," he replied

"And you're not," I said without missing a beat   
  


"No I'm not, I'm quite normal thank you very much,"

"Whatever. Get over it," I got up from where I was sitting. "I'm going to the kitchens to get some food, who's coming?"

"Got to do homework," James stated.

"Same," Remus said

Sirius grinned, "I've got homework too actually,"

"And what about you Peter? Homework too?" I couldn't believe what I was hearing. The _Marauders_, putting _schoolwork_ before _food?_ Certainly something to tell your grandchildren about. 

The smallest boy nodded "Yep. It's part of our "stay out of trouble" plan."

"And how long have you all been on with that plan," I said skeptically. It _so_ wasn't going to last.

"Well, you came in about five minutes ago, so," James said seriously "six minutes."

I chuckled "Riight, and how long are you hoping to stay out of trouble for?"

"Another week," Peter almost squeaked. The pressure was getting to him I think. I mean, six minutes without breaking a single rule…that was totally not their thing.

I nodded, trying to keep my face straight, but I couldn't keep from raising an eyebrow skeptically. 

"Well I'm going, its' not like it's breaking a rule," I said 

"Yeah, but we might get tempted," Sirius said, winking at me. 

"Oh yes, a trip with me to the kitchens, its just soo seductive of me to try and pull that," I deadpanned.

"But of course," Sirius returned, "all those House Elves in the kitchens…I mean, whoa-they're sexy beasts."

"Err," I said sarcastically "you do realize they're not technically 'beasts'."

"Yep, I just like saying 'sexy beast'."

"Alright, that's it, I'm going now," I said, mock horrified. "You guys are just too strange for me." I brushed invisible creases from my skirt theatrically as I stood up, and walked slowly to the door, trying to put the guy's resolve to the test. As if they could really resist food. Sure it was before dinner and all, but still boys will be boys. 

"Lily! I've been looking everywhere for you," Arabella Figg exclaimed as I almost walked straight into her as I had been looking over my shoulder. "We've got to get started on that assignment."

I groaned, spotting the totally stocked book bag she was carrying. "Do we have to start right now?" I protested. Stupid ruddy herbology assignment. 

"Yes, we do Lily," Arabella's brown eyes narrowed, and exasperation was written all over her pale face. "Remember what happened last time we put an assignment off. We had to stay up all night and almost failed!"

"You know, that wasn't entirely that bad, and practically the rest of the class failed anyway," I replied.

"No, we're going to get started right now," she said, straightening her pony tail 

"Listen to her," James called out, overhearing our conversation "we've only got about twenty minutes before dinner anyway."

Arabella looked at me expectantly. I was totally caged. There was no way in hell I was going to be able to get out of this one. And it was only for a bit. 

"Fine." I said grudgingly and allowed myself to be shepherded over to a pair of arm chairs. 

~*~

Five hours later, after dinner (which consisted of Peter and Sirius having an eating contest and Peter just narrowly winning by default), I was lying in bed, feeling utterly dead when the rest of the girls decided it was time for a giggly gossip session. I rolled over and tried to block out the noise with my pillow. Honestly, I should know by now that nothing sort of a silencing spell could shut up or block out the noise that Jenny and Tara's voices make. 

"Shut up, shut up, shut up," Arabella chanted under her breath from her bed on my right. I turned over to look at her lying there, eyes screwed up and fists visibly balled on the top of her quilt. 

"Do you reckon if we threaten to hole up the showers in the morning if they don't shut up they will?" I whispered to her.

"No," Arabella sighed, opening her eyes and facing me ruefully "I don't think they'll ever shut up. Although we could try," she said just as Jenny exclaimed in her shrill voice, "Oh my Lord!" (it's so much classier than God! You know…) "Are you kidding me! You're kidding me! James Potter and"- 

"Oh would you two **shut up**?!" I yelled, sitting straight upright and glaring at them full blast before she could finish.

Tara's blue eyes widened and she bit her lip "We were just talking,"

"No you weren't," I reprimanded "you were giggling and shrieking girlishly at maximum sound. Some of us are trying to sleep!"

"Fine!" Jenny sniffed, "We'll be quiet then." 

"I'll believe it when I see it," I muttered, but laid back down and attempted to go back to sleep. 

"Night Arabella," I said sleepily, over the pairs still audible giggling.

"Night Lily, and remember we've got study group at six so you can't be late or forget," she mumbled.

"Yeah, yeah, get over it I'll be there," I said before slipping off to sleep. 

~*~//~*~//~*~

A/N: I just want to take the time now to say that:

I'd appreciate it if you'd review, because you don't say I won't know. If I'm messing something up, I'll be oblivious until told. The next chapter is being written right now and will be out within four days of the initial posting date of this chapter. Thanks for reading this—I love writing it and am trying to go for something slightly original so be patient. 

//?//?//?//?//?//?//?//?//

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything associated with, or identifiably the work of J.K Rowling. I only own this plot, my characterization and any original characters I insert into the story. 

//?//?//?//?//?//?//?//?//


	2. II

Get Over It Chapter II 

_~By Pixie~_

So there I was, mouth half full of toothpaste, my toothbrush wedged between teeth and my cheek, sleep still in my eyes when James barged into the girls bathroom. 

"James!" I exclaimed. Well, _tried_ to exclaim. The toothpaste stopped any coherent sounds coming out of my mouth and I'm pretty sure the toothbrush didn't do much for it either. I spat hastily and dried my mouth with a towel.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Not much," he said, rapping the bench top lightly with his finger tips. 

"Not much? James it's like six in the morning, I'm just about to go to study group with Arabella and you come into the girls bathroom just because you feel like it?" I raised an eyebrow. Sometimes he can be so stupid.

"Fine, there is actually a point to this," He lent on the bench casually.

"Good, well, out with it then," I said packing my stuff in my bag. 

"I …I," James stuttered not looking directly at me "I met someone last night."

"Oh really," I muttered offhandedly "who was it? Filch? Did you get a detention or something?"

"No," 

"That's good then,"

"No, I mean no," He pulled at his hair, "Lily, I mean I _met_ someone last night."

"Huh?" I said, cocking my head to the side and regarded him skeptically.

"Good God Lily, you've been talking to Peter too much. You're starting to adopt his obliviousness," James said "I met a girl."

"That's nice. Who?" I asked him, knowing that at least the answer would be interesting. After all he did know a fair few of the girls in our year level, and also **knew** them as well, if you catch my drift. 

"Narcissa Renault, and don't say it-I know what you think of her," He replied very quickly.

"Oh God James, why could you have "met" someone less…, less, I don't know, tarty?" I exclaimed "There's heaps of normal girls in Hogwarts."

James folded his arms over his chest and adopted his stern "I am going to pretend I don't care what you think" face like he does when he's really annoyed at me. 

"I don't care Lily," he told me defensively "I'm in love."

I snorted. This was all too much. First that he was off snogging _Narcissa_ somewhere and now that he's in _love_? As if. With _her_? I don't _think_ so!

"Umm James? Are you sure," I said, once I'd regained some composure.

"I'm dead sure," he said and his eyes held a dreamy gaze. Suddenly something inside of me cracked. Instantly I felt like breaking down crying, curling up in bed and devouring a whole block of chocolate in one go for absolutely no reason. What was with this anyway? It was good that James' found someone. God knows we'd all heard enough of his "I'm searching for the right girl" spiel for a life time. 

"Ah uh, that's great mate," I picked up my towel "but I've got to go to study group. Talk to you later alright?" I dashed out of the bathroom, dumped my stuff on my bed and grabbed my bag and scarf without waiting for his reply. 

~*~

"But oh my god James, it's so true!" Narcissa exclaimed flirting at maximum capacity, twirling a long strand of blonde hair around her perfectly manicured finger. James gazed at her, absolutely captivated as he took another bite of his ham sandwich. 

"Nah…it's not. I'm not the greatest Chaser Hogwarts has ever seen…perhaps recently, but not ever," he flirted back after swallowing. I coughed loudly, making Narcissa drag her eyes away from James just long enough to regard me with a stern "get the hell over it?" look. I raised an eyebrow back at her and she turned away. 

They went back to just gazing into each other's eyes lovingly. In all the years I've known James Potter I've never once known him to flirt this badly with a girl. Wrinkling my nose at them, I placed my own sandwich back on it's place. This was simply nauseating. 

"What's up Lily, not eating?" Remus asked me politely. I looked over at him. Heaps of girls were after him, not exactly the absolutely most beautiful ones, but the girls who actually cared about people and stuff. _Sure, he's pretty hot_, I thought, regarding his lovely amber hued eyes. _But he's just a friend._

I shrugged "Not hungry anymore…I'll just have to pig out at dinner." I replied and looked over at Sirius who was currently trying his best to flirt with Arabella who was blatantly trying to deter him. Sirius was…_Sirius_. Good looking, dashing, caring, yet 'out there'…everything a girl could want within the walls of Hogwarts. But not the sort of guy for me. Suddenly I started staring at my plate, eyes wide as I realized I'd just been checking out my best friends to see if I'd go out with them or not. 

_What brought this on? _I bit my lip. This was so, so stupid. I mean, just because _James_ has a _girlfriend_ doesn't mean I have to get a boyfriend. Suddenly my stomach dropped for the second time that day, realization setting in. I had to get out of there. Like a startled deer I got up from my chair and dashed out of the Great Hall leaving the love birds alone. 

"Lily!" Sirius yelled after me and I tore off down the corridor. "Stop would you!" 

I kept running. I just wanted to be out of the castle, out where I could breathe for a bit. But when I came to the steps leading to the courtyard I could bring myself to walk down them. Sirius finally caught up, panting hard. 

"You've sure got a good sprint in you, any one ever told you that?" He said between gasps. I was silent. 

"Alright, we're going for a walk…" Sirius said after he'd regained his breath. 

~*~

"What is it Lily?" Sirius asked quietly as we rounded a corner. I sighed, and shaded my eyes with my hand as I looked out the window.

"Nothing, it's nothing." I replied. Since when did Sirius turn into Dr Black, Psychologist for all of Hogwarts? I couldn't recall ever having a heart to heart/ interrogation with him ever before…

"Come off it, there's something bothering you-I can tell I'm not as daft as I look," He said, almost offended that I wouldn't tell him. This was more like the Sirius I knew. 

"Well it's mainly to do with Narcissa and James," I said slowly, feeling as though each word was being dragged out of my mouth by a tow-truck. 

"And? What about them?"

I groaned. No matter how perceptive and sensitive Sirius could be at times, it still just wasn't his thing to work out stuff without being told. 

"I don't want them to go out," I replied snippily.

"Yeah, neither do I really," He said offhandedly "She's such a …a…, I don't know what it is exactly, but it's certainly not good."

I nodded "Exactly. But there's another reason other than that for why I don't want them to be together,"

"And that would be?" Sirius turned to face me, his brown hair flopping into his eyes obscuring them from my sight.

"I…oh God…I don't know,"

"Yes you do,"

"No I don't!" I insisted. This was so stupid, I was starting to get all girly and my voice was adopting a slight shrill tone.

"Yeah you do Lily, just say it would you?"

"Fine! I like him!" I exclaimed, and instantly checked around to see if there was anyone nearby that could have over heard. Why did I have to wait until the wrong moment to realize what I felt? It was like the world was against me and Narcissa just got crowned Queen of it.

"Umm…ok then," Sirius said, a little less perturbed by my outburst than I had expected "I like him too, after all you do tend to like your friends."

"No…," I started but then changed my mind. Hurling obscenities at Sirius about how oblivious he could be wouldn't exactly help the situation much. "No, I **like** him. I really don't think it's the same thing as you feel for him, unless…unless you swing that way, and that would be totally different. It'd be alright with me, but…" 

Sirius cracked up laughing at me digging myself into a huge hole. "Don't worry Lily, it's fine. But I understand now. Why haven't you said anything before?"

"I couldn't," I replied insistently "he's like one of my best friends. Wouldn't you be freaked out if I suddenly came up to you when you'd just started going out with some girl and told you that I liked you?"

"Uh, well you've got a point there," he conceded "but you never know. He might just be going out with Narcissa because he's afraid or something to ask you out."

I snorted "Oh and so that was why he went out with Amy, and Melinda, and oh hell-Jacqueline and Amanda too then?"

"Well, no, he did like them, but…" Sirius trailed off and I knew I should stop screwing with his mind about this.

"Alright, so that was in the past and everything. I get it. There's always a chance, you're the eternal optimist, but that doesn't change anything, I'm still in the same situation," I said cynically.

"Yeah that's true, but you could…you could like change some of the stuff about you to make him notice you," 

"Sirius, darl, if he hasn't noticed me now, after we've known each other for six years-I doubt he ever will?" I raised an eyebrow "And who's to say I want to change?"

"Well you know acting like a girl might help," he said gruffly. 

"Acting like a"- I exclaimed "oh I can see where this is heading. You think I'm not feminine enough don't you."

"No that's not it, it's"- 

"Well excuse _me_ Mr. I-Think-Girls-Should-All-Conform-To-Be-The-Same, but I'm not like that," I barged on "sure I play sport and I occasionally use my sleeve as a hanky but that's not because I'm not "girly" it's usually because I've forgotten a tissue _actually_." 

"Oh get over it would you Lily?" Sirius said angrily "I'm only trying to help here. All I was trying to say was that making a very loud joke about sex in the Great Hall like you did the other day probably isn't exactly …charming…behavior."

"Sorry," I said quietly, looking down at my shoes. "But it was funny." I looked up again at him and grinned. 

Sirius laughed, obviously recalling it. "Sure was, I wish I'd came out with that…"

"But what am I meant to do?" I persisted.

"…Tell him you like him," Sirius suggested, shrugging.

"Tell him I what? Hell no! No, absolutely no," I said adamantly "No what in hell will I do that,"

"So you want to keep feeling bad and him to keep going out with Narcissa then?" Sirius said pointedly 

"Not really," I conceded "I know, I'll…just get over it."

"You won't, you never do Lily. You just worry and fret over things but never do anything about them,"

See, this is the problem with having friends that know you. They have this annoying habit about being right about things you'd rather them not be. 

"Fine, alright, I'll tell him," I said slowly "don't know when though."

"It doesn't matter exactly when, just make it…soon." Sirius advised. I sighed again, knowing this wouldn't be easy and yet had to be done. After all, if I couldn't tell my friend I liked him, who could I tell?

"Lily!" 

I spun around to see Arabella striding towards us.

"I've been looking everywhere for you, we've got to go to the library before dinner,"

I groaned "You and that damned Herbology assignment!" I exclaimed. Honestly, school is the most retarded thing. It cuts into everything, fretting about guys, quidditch practice, worrying that James was probably off snogging Narcissa in a empty room as I stood there…

"Well it's got to be done Lily!" Arabella said defensively.

"Don't worry about her Bella-she's just a bit…distracted at the moment," Sirius advised her.

Arabella narrowed her eyes and glared up at him. 

"Don't, ever, call me Bella." She said icily.

"Why not?" 

I snorted quietly to myself. Sirius was playing with fire near a stick of dynamite. If I hadn't annoyed Arabella enough by whining about the assignment, he was doing a pretty good job of sending her all the way by calling her that. 

"I don't, like it," Arabella said "My name is Arabella. Call me that, or nothing at all."

"How bout if I call you…if I call you…," Sirius thought for a bit "if I call you Cat Woman?"

Arabella shook her head in disgust. "As if you would Sirius! Come on Lily, we've got to go," and with that she grabbed me by the arm and proceeded to try and drag me in the direction of the library.

"Thanks Sirius!" I called out to him, before I got pulled around the corner and into the library. 

"No problem," I could just hear him say. 

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Author's Note: I'd just like to formally apologise for stating that this chapter would be out ages ago, when in fact it wasn't. This was mostly due to school, which unfortunately has to take priority over fan fic writing. L 

The next chapter should be out within a week, school work permitting (only another 3 weeks of this before holidays! Yay.) so look out for it then. 

If you'd care to review, I'd really appriciate it, and my deepest thanks goes out to all those people who reviewed my first chapter-you all really made my day. 

Disclaimer: As stated in the first chapter…


	3. III

Get Over It Chapter III 

_~By Pixie~ _

Sighing happily, I slammed shut the last of the books that we'd been using and deposited them on the returns trolley. Finally, that stupid Herbology assignment was finished. Early too, amazingly we still had four days until it was due. 

"Lily, it's not entirely _that_ great that the assignment is done, we should have worked on it a bit more I think," Arabella almost fretted as she collected up her quills and ink

I shook my head, "No way, it's finished and that's it. No more work on that thing-ever."

Arabella chuckled "I'll never understand how someone who reads so many books can't stand doing assignments. Honestly Lily, it's not that different."

"Sure it is," I said defensively "I read for fun, sometimes assignments are alright like Defense Against the Dark Arts, but not _Herbology_, it's totally impractical."

"It is not!" Arabella exclaimed loudly, almost in spite of herself. She looked around the library sheepishly. "I mean, I think we should just go back to the Common Room."

"Well, you're right about that at least," I grinned and led the way out of the library.

~*~

Inside the Common Room, Arabella made a totally fake excuse to go to bed and I could just tell she was going to try and work on our assignment some more. But, because I just couldn't be bothered to force her to stay by this time, I let it go. After all, it's much more fun talking to the guys without having to try and keep the conversation clean. 

Plonking down in one of the armchairs I exhaled loudly, purely glad to be with just the guys for once. 

"So you finished it did you?" James asked casually as he looked up from a letter he was writing. _Dear Narcissa,_ it began, I could just make out the words in his untidy handwriting from the distance. Suddenly I felt mildly ill. It was almost amazing, but I had honestly forgotten about him and her until that moment. Well, maybe not, but still it came as a shock.

I nodded, trying to forge a smile. 

"Nights are so boring these days," Sirius mused out loud.

"Yeah," Peter sighed "they're usually the best times for plotting pranks…but now because we can't it's boring."

"That's what I meant Peter," Sirius said.

"Alright, stop it before you go any further. Hmm," I bit my lip thinking of something to distract them from fighting with each other "I've got a joke."

Sirius' face perked up, instantly interested. 

"Alright then Lily, go on," Peter said almost excitedly.

I cleared my throat. This was totally going against Sirius' advice to be charming and slightly more girly, but it would at least for a bit clear the air. 

"Ok, this is sort of a guy joke but seeing how you're all male it should be ok, if not odd that I'm the one telling it erm," I said uneasily trying to rectify myself. 

"Go on," Sirius urged 

"Right. How can you tell if your sperm count is up?" I said daringly

Peter wrinkled his nose in distaste, Sirius grinned wickedly and James just shook his head and kept writing.

"Your girlfriend has to chew before she swallows," I finished, almost instantly regretting telling this particular joke. 

The guys burst into a bought of disgusted laughter, and I couldn't help but to join in. After all it was just a joke. Wait on, Peter…Sirius…James…what the,

"Where the hells' Remus?" I asked almost incoherently through my laughter.

"He's up in the dorm," James replied, "felt tired or something,"

"Can I go up to see him?" I questioned, knowing that I really should ask first. 

"Sure, no one else is up there and it's not exactly like you're going to shag him or anything," James said shrugging. I thought I'd be allowed up, after all I had been before.

Out of the corner of my eye I could see Sirius' expression change considerably as James mentioned shagging Remus. Interesting, that was. It could have just been because they're such close friends, and I suppose the idea of me having…_relations_ with one of them would have been disgusting in his eyes, but I seriously was starting to doubt it. But, it was their choice to tell us when they were sure, of course. 

"Great," I flashed him what I hoped was my best casual smile and made my way up to the boys dorm.

"Don't forget to swallow!" Peter called after me, which of course prompted the need to turn around and give him a rather inappropriate gesture over the balcony. Shaking my head at the immaturity of males, I knocked on the door, just to make sure it was safe to come in.

"It's alright Lily, you can come in," Remus' voice drifted out to me quietly. I pushed open the door and walked in the room which was, being a boys dorm, very messy indeed. 

"How'd you know it was me?" I asked 

"None of the other's would have knocked. They just barge straight in," Remus explained.

I nodded, being entirely considerate wasn't exactly something that the other three Marauder's possessed. Caring, yes, but obeying polite conventions like knocking on a door before entering? Definitely not. 

"So, Sirius told me about your little predicament," he said matter of factly.

I widened my eyes in surprise "Is there nothing that you two _don't _share?" I exclaimed, stupidly aghast that Sirius had told another person about my issue with James even though that person was of course most likely the best one to talk about it to. 

Remus fidgeted uncomfortably with the blanket on his bed from where he was sitting on it. 

"Fine, sorry," I apologized for something that neither of us would let on was happening. "Fine, I love him."

"Wow, that was easy," Remus said with a raised eyebrow "I thought it'd take at least ten minutes of you saying that there was nothing wrong, and then another fifteen for you to admit it. I'm shocked."

"Alright, alright," I snapped back "you don't have to pay me out you know." Why was I there anyway? It wasn't like I _needed_ to be reassured that James' wasn't going to …propose to Narcissa. That'd be jumping to conclusions. They'd only been together for a day…not that I _had_ thought of that, I _hadn't, _but _still_… God. I mentally shook myself out of my internal battle.

"I'm going. Sorry to disturb you Remus, hope you feel better by tomorrow or whatever." I turned on my heel and stalked out "Good night." I called over my shoulder, ignoring his pleas that he _was sorry and if I'd just lose my red head temper for just a moment_… 

Shaking my head I wandered into the girls dorms. Only Arabella was there, scribbling frantically on a piece of parchment. She looked up sheepishly as I walked in.

"Caught out," I said, trying to forge a cheerful tone. 

She shrugged "I couldn't help but think that we might have"-

"Don't worry about it Arabella, I'm not going to pick on you about going over the assignment again," I broke into her excuse. I flopped onto my bed, feeling rather dejected and very confused. 

"What's up Lily?" 

"The sky," I deadpanned in reply. I just did not feel like rationalizing myself to anyone. 

"Come on, it can't be that bad. Who better would understand than me?" Arabella asked, trying in vain to coax me into telling her. 

I snorted before I could restrain myself "Sure, whatever," I blurted out, adding a marker to my already dug grave. 

"So that's what you think is it?" Arabella demanded, anger growing with her every word "That I'm just some sort of freak that only thinks about school work and homework and nothing else?"

"No of course not,"-

"Yes it is! I thought you were my friend Lily, I thought you knew me better than to think that, but I was obviously wrong!" with that she got up and stormed off down to the Common room. It wouldn't do her that much good, after all eventually she'd have to come up to the dorm. 

"Arabella! Get over it I never said that!" I yelled after her retreating figure, but she didn't turn around or anything. 

This was just the most fantastic day. I ripped out my hair tie and let my red curls fall over my face. I never wanted things to go like this. But in one day all I'd accomplished was totally annoying one of my friends, getting annoyed at another of my friends, being slightly depressed about another of my friends going out with someone I didn't want him to go out with. Who needs friends anyway, all they seem to do is make things complicated. But a nagging inner part of myself just kept saying _you do Lily, _but I refused to listen to it. 

Soon the other girls would come up to go to bed and I didn't want to have the chance of having to make them shut up again so I changed into my pajamas and tried to get to sleep. 

~*~

It was absolutely freezing, and I was only wearing a light dress. The breeze caught my hair which for once wasn't tied up out of my face and blew it around my shoulders, tickling the exposed skin lightly. I had no idea where I was but it was very pretty and green. Scenic, and it was twilight I realized, as I caught a glimpse of the almost completely set sun through the tall trees. 

"Lily," someone's voice called to me softly. I knew that voice and my stomach dropped. 

"James?" I whispered as I turned around, and around again trying to spot him. 

"Can't you see me?" his voice said again, and I realized I could only just spot him sitting on the grass wearing a deep green sweater. I ran over to him, half scared for no reason at all.

"James, why are you here?" I said as I dropped down beside him. He turned to face me, his grey eyes solemn behind his wire framed glasses. 

"Why are any of us here?" he replied with a rather Zen tone "But we are."

"Uh, alright," I said slightly perturbed by his words "I have to tell you something."

He reached out and tucked a bit of my hair behind my ear, and lent very close. It was amazingly great and horrible in the same moment. It was as if my heart was so happy it just couldn't feel any more emotions and would burst at any given moment. 

"Don't worry, I know," he said softly "I have to tell you something too."

"What is it?" I asked, my breath catching in my throat stupidly.

"She's the one," he replied simply, looking into my eyes so I could see the truthfulness that laid in his face. 

"No," I whispered "no."

"Yes," he said slightly louder. My vision became distorted and it appeared like James was fading away. 

"No!" I insisted, trying in vain to reach out and grab onto his sweater. But he wasn't there anymore. 

I woke up at about midnight, heart absolutely thumping from fear, startled and cold. 

"God, that was _not_ good," I told myself. I laid back down and stared up at the ceiling of my four poster bed trying to think of nothing. 

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A/N: Sorry for the delay. I doubt I'll keep saying when the next chapter will be out by, because everything in my life is getting rather …_dependable_ on what's happening and that changes too much. I will still try and get it out as fast as possible though. A BETA reader may assist with this. And yes, I am going to be writing inferred slash, and perhaps very mild slash, but I didn't write it into the summary as  a) it's not a big part of the story  and b) no one writes "het" in their summaries so why should slash have to be? Sorry if this offends anyone.

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**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything associated with, or identifiably the work of J.K Rowling. I only own this plot, my characterization and any original characters I insert into the story.

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